專欄裁員

‘Hello there’: eight lessons from Microsoft’s awful job loss memo

Barely 10 days old, Stephen Elop’s “Hello there” memo has already become a classic example of how not to fire people. It is a 1,110-word document stiff with “appropriate financial envelopes”, “ramp-downs” and “ecosystems” which, towards the end, casually mentions that thousands of Microsoft jobs are to go. Rather than dish out the bad news directly, the executive vice-president takes refuge behind a curious subjunctive: “We plan that this would result in an estimated reduction of 12,500 . . . employees.”

Yet to focus on Mr Elop’s tin ear misses something. This memo deserves to become a set text for all executives interested in communication. It adds value by showcasing the delivery of business piffle that is perfectly aligned with current high-end management guff. It is a case study in how not to write, how not to think, and how not to lead a business.

The only trouble with the text is that it is almost impossible to read. It took me several attempts to get to the end, but having now made it, I feel I ought to perform the public service of passing on eight golden rules that occurred to me while slogging my way through.

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露西•凱拉韋

露西•凱拉韋(Lucy Kellaway)是英國《金融時報》的管理專欄作家。在過去十年的時間裏,她用幽默的語言調侃各種職場現象,併爲讀者出謀劃策。她的專欄每週一出版在英國《金融時報》。露西在2006年獲得英國出版業獎的「年度專欄作家」獎項。

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